web analytics

deborah | biancotti

Category: life

  • I have no internet, but I must scream

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    In the re-introduced enforced absence of internet at home, I have found that my computer speaks. ‘Computer,’ I say, ‘what time is it?’ ‘It is 9.24 pm,’ says the computer in a rush. ‘Computer,’ I say, ‘tell me a joke.’ ‘Knock knock,’ says the computer instantly. ‘Computer, who’s there?’ ‘Tivoli,’ says the computer, with eagerness.…

  • Never could get the hang of fucking Thursdays

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    I caught a bit of Today Tonight, um, this evening, & they were featuring such crucial stories as: 1. Single fathers cop too much flack. So all you people out there giving flacks to single dads — & I’m thinking there must be, oh, I dunno … several of you, at least — I want…

  • I have seen my future. In it, I wear the same shoes.

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    I’m in town today with my friend K. & she points out that there’s a homeless guy ahead of us who seems to be partying on pretty fiercely. “Gee, he’s having a good time, eh?” she says, as the bum starts ranting & singing & rumaging through a bin & singing & ranting some more.…

  • What is the inverse of Murphy’s Law?

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    And just like that it was over, and all the fussing & working & unhappy phone calls to the support line and the arrival of technicians & more fussing, much, much more fussing, didn’t seem to have made a speck of difference. But suddenly, after the phone calls and the frustration and the superstition and…

  • For the Clarion South Kiddies

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    http://www.tuginternet.com/jja/journal/archives/002330.html “Over a noisy lunch the other day, I overheard Ellen Datlow talking about her experiences in Australia and New Zealand while she was teaching Clarion South. I only caught bits and pieces of the conversation, but I heard someone say “I heard they’re mean,” to which Gordon replied “That’s because they’re all hopped up…

  • Happy Birthday to Me

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    It’s my birthday today & I think you should all take a moment to celebrate being alive. :) Yay!

  • Shaving the yak

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    There’s an episode of M*A*S*H where Hawkeye wants something*, but to get it he needs a favour from someone, & when he approaches them, he’s told he’ll have to pay off a debt they have to someone else, & then that someone else wants something else, etc, etc, etc, & in the end, Hawkeye weaves…

  • Special skills

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    When it comes to painting a room, turns out I have two special gifts. One is the ability to stand in paint. Even if there’s only one drop of paint on the floor, I am guaranteed to stand in it & track it all across the room & possibly the house. So certain is this…

  • Just another night at casa mia

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    So it goes like this:

  • Update: Local Guide

    —

    by

    deborahb
    in

    So I just saw a guy wheeling a shopping trolley with an office chair in it, all the way down my street. And I’m thinking: why’s he need the trolley? The chair has wheels. Just push the chair. I’m telling you, shopping trolleys are the new mode of inner city transport. The only thing I’d…